(Heavy Metal) Attic - The Invocation - 2012, FLAC (image+.cue), lossless

I'd probably despise Attic's full-length debut for being completely unoriginal had it not been a world-class model of King Diamond/Mercyful Fate worship. Look at these song titles: "Join the Coven," "The Headless Rider," "Ghost of the Orphanage," "Funeral in the Woods"…I was half-expecting to see band members named Hank McShermann and King Quartz…because he's not the real King Diamond, get it? Mineral jokes usually don't work; that's why I seldom get laid. Back on topic, these guys are all about kneeling before the King and his Mercyful Fates and definitely act as an appropriate substitute for the real thing(s), although at times they fly a bit too close to the sun. They're a band that knows how to write proper material first and properly worship second, and the fact that they've taken an interest in Mercyful Fate and King Diamond only makes them more appealing.

Think of "The Invocation" as fake crab meat: it isn't the real thing, but it doesn't matter. It's still good. Very good. In a way they've produced an updated take on the whole Mercyful Fate thing with heavier riffs and some borderline elements that briefly engage outer genetics like power metal or even black metal themes. The vocalist, Meister Cagliostro, is to Attic what Charlie is to It‘s Always Sunny in Philadelphia; he's just a goddamn riot. His King Diamond-isms—nailing insanely high falsettos and using gritty low-end chimes like both are just daily chores—are just about the real thing. Hearing him bellow ridiculously campy and entertaining lyrics about horror and Satan and doom and gloom makes the icing on the cake that much sweeter; it's impossible to not find his performance impressive.

The riffs often put up flags similar to that one guy who wrote "Abigail" and other albums; he's royalty, or something. It's fairly standard fare for the brand of heavy metal that it is, but they sequentially yield some truly outstanding pieces that'll make your neck snap. They rifle through high-powered bullets that all manage to balance intensity, atmosphere, and a degree of horror, and "The Invocation" really ends up running the same routine but the whole piece simply rules. "Satan's Bride" and "Evil Inheritance" are vapid and unmemorable and end the album on rougher territory due to their slumping performances compared to the remaining songs; the worship, although flattering, needs something more than empty praise.

Of course, the two songs mentioned are merely outliers within an album that typically burns like the touch of a witch. Their ideas and general processes aren't very ambitious, even though they display an impressive arsenal of killer riffs and usually balance the equation with admirable precision. "The Invocation" is mainly an appealing listen because of its similarities to Mercyful Fate and King Diamond, which is somewhat of a double-edged sword: it showcases just how dependent Attic really is. They also can't touch their cohorts like In Solitude due to their risk-free mold, another minor issue robbing the group of some of its entitled validity. "The Invocation" isn't a legendary album despite its best efforts, but it's still a wicked blast.